ASS WATER

"Brewed in the Backside"

For the prospectors. The early risers. The ones who work hard and drink harder. Coffee that kicks like a mule and tastes like victory.

BORN IN THE CANYON

Out here, there's no fancy espresso machines. No baristas asking about oat milk. Just you, the sunrise, and a damn good cup of coffee.

Ass Water is for people who don't take themselves too seriously — but take their coffee very seriously.

PROSPECTOR STRONG

Bold enough to fuel a 12-hour dig. Smooth enough to enjoy at sunset.

DESERT ROASTED

Sun-baked beans with that rugged, smoky character you can't fake.

STUBBORN QUALITY

We're stubborn as a mule about one thing: making coffee worth drinking.

WHAT'S COMING

Premium products with ridiculous names. Actually delicious stuff.

MERCH DROP

Shirts, mugs, and gear for folks who appreciate a good laugh with their morning brew.

Coming Soon

PREMIUM ROASTS

Whole bean and ground coffee with names you'll be proud to display in your kitchen.

Coming Soon

GIFT SETS

Perfect for the friend who has everything except a sense of humor about their coffee.

Coming Soon